|Posted: 23 November 2015 at 5:50pm | IP Logged
5THS VS OLD CHALLONERS
Following the previous weeks shenanigans it was a pleasure to play such a generous opponent in the Old Challoners School motto “Couldn’t hit a cow’s a.se with a banjo”.
With the North wind blowing an icy gale we set off for the grass lands over the fence and on to the big boy’s pitches.
Luckily Nick Platon is still recovering from a broken big toe caused by putting his foot in it again and so we didn’t have to send out a search party to locate him in the long grass.
With conditions bordering on Polar we finally gathered enough players to start the game having, in a clever tactic, left the opposition out on the pitch to freeze for half an hour.
The first twenty minutes was end to end with chances going begging at both ends.
The Challoners centre forward, Tom Daley, broke free from the iron like grip of Dan Woolley and bore down on goal. Biggles Farrance came charging out and headed off towards the Pied Bull. This seemed to confuse the Challoners s player who with the goal completely empty hit the post. The impressive Rob Johnson hacked the rebound clear. With the two goals total out of alignment Biggles had his excuse.
Mid way through the 1st half Tomi picked the ball up inside his own half. He then went on a mazy run beating 6 defenders taking the bus to Enfield Chase and a train to Finsbury Park before slotting the ball in the corner. 1-0 …….Amazed we celebrated. Tomi doesn’t score one on ones so six on one was something else.
A second almost carbon copy goal followed. Again Tomi beat 6 players including John “8.8”Farrell twice and found the bottom corner. 2-0.
The game continued to ebb and flow until Pete Johnson decided to assault the referee. Clearly disgusted with himself at having had a shave that morning and been in at 10.30pm the night before Pete launched himself into a header that went in the bushes. Being completely sober he lost his bearings and bundled the ref to the ground. Phil thought the ref was dead so he rifled his pockets for the match fee but fortunately the old fella (the ref not Pete) was ok.
Nothing much happened to the end of the 55 minute half and we came off for a strange team talk because we were leading The referee played 55 minutes to make up for the 35 minutes he played the last time he was ref against us.
Second half started whilst we were still having our team talk as Challoners got the bit between their teeth.
Biggles Farrance came into his own. Save after save as he single handily kept the oppo out. We looked on from the side-lines in admiration for the man and his newly gained eyesight.
Challoners were getting closer and closer to our goal but further and further away with their shooting.
New signing Sam came on in the midfield to replace the spent flush Tim “You want minicab mister “Winter and the team dug in.
To everyone’s amazement including themselves Challoners scored.2-1 The boys continued to let them have other free shots at goal on the basis that lightening doesn’t strike twice.
DANGER lurked when the centre forward bore down on the penalty area. Biggles “penalty a game “ Farrance came flying out and Tom Daley took off from the 10 metre board. This time the dive earned a rare perfect 10 from the ref rather than the mandatory penalty.
The centre forward, who was their worst culprit for misses, was subbed with 10 minutes to go.
In a sulky fit he booted one of their practice balls at the group of bags on the side-line , missed and had to chase the ball 60 yards.
The ref finally put Challenors out of their misery and we’d won.
Shout outs to the 3 man defence Rob, Phil & Dan, to Mick Ward and TK Junior as well as Tomi MOM. Quick mention for new boy Andre “Akinfenwe” Henry, who we hope enjoyed himself and we’ll see him again soon.
Bring on next week.