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5s V Parliamentarians
OIFC Forum5th XI Reports

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  oifc_admin
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Joined: 24 April 2007
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 463
Posted: 25 October 2011 at 2:26pm | IP Logged  

5X1 V Parliamentarians Lost 7-0

BREAKING NEWS
 
Apologies to all devotees of the truth that is the 5X1 match report but the 5X1 have been disgracefully censored this week from reporting on one of the lowest events in the club's proud history.

 
I have been banned from saying anymore but I will say this - I suggest people read Alexander Dumas' The Count of Monte Cristo, no matter how long it
f@cking takes - good will vanquish evil.


MATCH REPORT


We started the game with 8 men and were 5-0 down after 35 mins for the following reasons:


1. Ruane was half an hour late as he had to go to Kuwait to get some emergency oil for his hair.


2. McKevitt and Ford were arrested in Lithuania trying to buy arms for the Real IRA but managed to escape on the last Ryanair flight out of Vilnius with an RPG and Tomahawk missile in their respective wigs and did not turn up for the match.


Do you know what.......that's it for this week. I daren't risk futher censorship by actually talking about football! 


The 5X1 know the score.


MOM - Sean Nolan, great debut and great battling.


Tom Barrett/Chris Harrington/Tom Mullarkey - no shows gain this week. They are up in Manchester showing recently adopted son Cockoo the ropes of Necro on Betty from Coronation Street. They hope to celebrate by using Ken Barlow's jism for a nice hotpot dinner.
Yours Sincerely,
 
Edmund Dantes


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